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  3. We need to talk more about reducing "tone policing" here.

We need to talk more about reducing "tone policing" here.

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  • scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
    scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
    scottjenson@social.coop
    wrote last edited by
    #1

    We need to talk more about reducing "tone policing" here. I understand you want people to use content warnings, but guess what? They don't have to! If they don't do it, just unfollow them.

    But please, don't harass them. That's what drove away our last big wave.

    Do whatever you need to feel safe, but harassing people to your standards doesn't make THEM feel safe. Stop it.

    thebratdragon@mastodon.scotT blainsmith@snac.rblgk.shB xyhhx@social.treehouse.systemsX stefan@stefanbohacek.onlineS thibaultamartin@mamot.frT 13 Replies Last reply
    2
    • scottjenson@social.coopS scottjenson@social.coop

      We need to talk more about reducing "tone policing" here. I understand you want people to use content warnings, but guess what? They don't have to! If they don't do it, just unfollow them.

      But please, don't harass them. That's what drove away our last big wave.

      Do whatever you need to feel safe, but harassing people to your standards doesn't make THEM feel safe. Stop it.

      thebratdragon@mastodon.scotT This user is from outside of this forum
      thebratdragon@mastodon.scotT This user is from outside of this forum
      thebratdragon@mastodon.scot
      wrote last edited by
      #2

      @scottjenson

      had one of them the other day, told me off because they didn't like my tone, gave me a list of rules to follow and they broke their own rules 2 & 3 to tell me to follow those rules.

      scottjenson@social.coopS 1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • scottjenson@social.coopS scottjenson@social.coop

        We need to talk more about reducing "tone policing" here. I understand you want people to use content warnings, but guess what? They don't have to! If they don't do it, just unfollow them.

        But please, don't harass them. That's what drove away our last big wave.

        Do whatever you need to feel safe, but harassing people to your standards doesn't make THEM feel safe. Stop it.

        blainsmith@snac.rblgk.shB This user is from outside of this forum
        blainsmith@snac.rblgk.shB This user is from outside of this forum
        blainsmith@snac.rblgk.sh
        wrote last edited by
        #3
        I always found CWs to be backwards. How the hell am I supposed to know what is going to set someone off? They should honestly be removed and let readers self-filter.
        marionline@autistics.lifeM 1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • scottjenson@social.coopS scottjenson@social.coop

          We need to talk more about reducing "tone policing" here. I understand you want people to use content warnings, but guess what? They don't have to! If they don't do it, just unfollow them.

          But please, don't harass them. That's what drove away our last big wave.

          Do whatever you need to feel safe, but harassing people to your standards doesn't make THEM feel safe. Stop it.

          xyhhx@social.treehouse.systemsX This user is from outside of this forum
          xyhhx@social.treehouse.systemsX This user is from outside of this forum
          xyhhx@social.treehouse.systems
          wrote last edited by
          #4

          @scottjenson

          scottjenson@social.coopS 1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • thebratdragon@mastodon.scotT thebratdragon@mastodon.scot

            @scottjenson

            had one of them the other day, told me off because they didn't like my tone, gave me a list of rules to follow and they broke their own rules 2 & 3 to tell me to follow those rules.

            scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
            scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
            scottjenson@social.coop
            wrote last edited by
            #5

            @Thebratdragon yeah we can add all sorts of features to mastodon but if these folks keep chasing new folks away, it just won't matter

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • xyhhx@social.treehouse.systemsX xyhhx@social.treehouse.systems

              @scottjenson

              scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
              scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
              scottjenson@social.coop
              wrote last edited by
              #6

              @xyhhx

              Yes

              (Two can play at that game)

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • scottjenson@social.coopS scottjenson@social.coop

                We need to talk more about reducing "tone policing" here. I understand you want people to use content warnings, but guess what? They don't have to! If they don't do it, just unfollow them.

                But please, don't harass them. That's what drove away our last big wave.

                Do whatever you need to feel safe, but harassing people to your standards doesn't make THEM feel safe. Stop it.

                stefan@stefanbohacek.onlineS This user is from outside of this forum
                stefan@stefanbohacek.onlineS This user is from outside of this forum
                stefan@stefanbohacek.online
                wrote last edited by
                #7

                @scottjenson I generally agree with the sentiment here, I'd just add that the appropriate use of CWs should be clearly stated in the server rules, and posts breaking them should be reported to the server's admin to handle, rather than a bunch of people from different servers forming a perhaps well-meaning mob and repeating the same message.

                Have you seen this poll, by the way?

                https://stefanbohacek.online/@stefan/113623004004461223

                Nicely shows how leading by example works best!

                scottjenson@social.coopS 1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • stefan@stefanbohacek.onlineS stefan@stefanbohacek.online

                  @scottjenson I generally agree with the sentiment here, I'd just add that the appropriate use of CWs should be clearly stated in the server rules, and posts breaking them should be reported to the server's admin to handle, rather than a bunch of people from different servers forming a perhaps well-meaning mob and repeating the same message.

                  Have you seen this poll, by the way?

                  https://stefanbohacek.online/@stefan/113623004004461223

                  Nicely shows how leading by example works best!

                  scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                  scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                  scottjenson@social.coop
                  wrote last edited by
                  #8

                  @stefan I completely agree! If it's part of your server rules then by all means, but it's up to the folks of that server to enforce, not some rando that doesn't like your hashtag.

                  I'm not saying never use CWs, I'm saying don't lecture people about it.

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • scottjenson@social.coopS scottjenson@social.coop

                    We need to talk more about reducing "tone policing" here. I understand you want people to use content warnings, but guess what? They don't have to! If they don't do it, just unfollow them.

                    But please, don't harass them. That's what drove away our last big wave.

                    Do whatever you need to feel safe, but harassing people to your standards doesn't make THEM feel safe. Stop it.

                    thibaultamartin@mamot.frT This user is from outside of this forum
                    thibaultamartin@mamot.frT This user is from outside of this forum
                    thibaultamartin@mamot.fr
                    wrote last edited by
                    #9

                    @scottjenson I don't have any data about the usefulness of Content Warnings but I can't think of a use case not already covered by filters.

                    I rely on filters for content I don't want to see, and I don't need CW to match it. Are there cases where CWs catch what filters don't?

                    scottjenson@social.coopS ricci@discuss.systemsR 2 Replies Last reply
                    0
                    • thibaultamartin@mamot.frT thibaultamartin@mamot.fr

                      @scottjenson I don't have any data about the usefulness of Content Warnings but I can't think of a use case not already covered by filters.

                      I rely on filters for content I don't want to see, and I don't need CW to match it. Are there cases where CWs catch what filters don't?

                      scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                      scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                      scottjenson@social.coop
                      wrote last edited by
                      #10

                      @thibaultamartin I don't think it matters as many people never use CWs the "right way" so will never be caught properly.

                      Btw, I'm not saying we should never use CWs there could be some strong content that a server wants to always be me marked. But that's up to server admins to enforce not randos yelling at newcomers

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • scottjenson@social.coopS scottjenson@social.coop

                        We need to talk more about reducing "tone policing" here. I understand you want people to use content warnings, but guess what? They don't have to! If they don't do it, just unfollow them.

                        But please, don't harass them. That's what drove away our last big wave.

                        Do whatever you need to feel safe, but harassing people to your standards doesn't make THEM feel safe. Stop it.

                        tsvenson@fosstodon.orgT This user is from outside of this forum
                        tsvenson@fosstodon.orgT This user is from outside of this forum
                        tsvenson@fosstodon.org
                        wrote last edited by
                        #11

                        @scottjenson

                        Would like to suggest combining "tone policing" with how we can make it easier for new users to grasp how every instance can set their own "rules" for their users - often in a CoC and/or ToS.

                        But within limits, as otherwise risk getting defederated.

                        Some guidelines on making it easy for users to find someones home instance and the rules it has could also be good. Both for instance admins and users.

                        scottjenson@social.coopS 1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • tsvenson@fosstodon.orgT tsvenson@fosstodon.org

                          @scottjenson

                          Would like to suggest combining "tone policing" with how we can make it easier for new users to grasp how every instance can set their own "rules" for their users - often in a CoC and/or ToS.

                          But within limits, as otherwise risk getting defederated.

                          Some guidelines on making it easy for users to find someones home instance and the rules it has could also be good. Both for instance admins and users.

                          scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                          scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                          scottjenson@social.coop
                          wrote last edited by
                          #12

                          @tsvenson excellent suggestion

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • blainsmith@snac.rblgk.shB blainsmith@snac.rblgk.sh
                            I always found CWs to be backwards. How the hell am I supposed to know what is going to set someone off? They should honestly be removed and let readers self-filter.
                            marionline@autistics.lifeM This user is from outside of this forum
                            marionline@autistics.lifeM This user is from outside of this forum
                            marionline@autistics.life
                            wrote last edited by
                            #13

                            @blainsmith @scottjenson I don't think it's such a problem, at least I haven't seen it be with the people I follow....

                            I guess it's a kind gesture to put CW if you know that some people don't want to see/can't see without panic, e.g. spiders.
                            I don't think such warnings are a bad thing in general. Things get bad if done excessively and we all may draw that line in different places. 🤷

                            Then again I make use of filters a lot to block out posts about politics. I like that I can easily unto filters and read posts anyway.

                            scottjenson@social.coopS 1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • marionline@autistics.lifeM marionline@autistics.life

                              @blainsmith @scottjenson I don't think it's such a problem, at least I haven't seen it be with the people I follow....

                              I guess it's a kind gesture to put CW if you know that some people don't want to see/can't see without panic, e.g. spiders.
                              I don't think such warnings are a bad thing in general. Things get bad if done excessively and we all may draw that line in different places. 🤷

                              Then again I make use of filters a lot to block out posts about politics. I like that I can easily unto filters and read posts anyway.

                              scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                              scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                              scottjenson@social.coop
                              wrote last edited by
                              #14

                              @marionline @blainsmith exactly, to each their own. The point isn't to say we shouldn't have CWs only that their use will ALWAYS be sketchy and you shouldn't count on it. I'm just saying people should not harass others into doing it "their way" (of course, you're not saying that!)

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • scottjenson@social.coopS scottjenson@social.coop

                                We need to talk more about reducing "tone policing" here. I understand you want people to use content warnings, but guess what? They don't have to! If they don't do it, just unfollow them.

                                But please, don't harass them. That's what drove away our last big wave.

                                Do whatever you need to feel safe, but harassing people to your standards doesn't make THEM feel safe. Stop it.

                                kevinhippert@c.imK This user is from outside of this forum
                                kevinhippert@c.imK This user is from outside of this forum
                                kevinhippert@c.im
                                wrote last edited by
                                #15

                                @scottjenson Arn’t you language and tone policing to try to make your online environment more to your liking? You want to set a community standard of being more chill about content warnings while your opponents want them taken more seriously.

                                Why not engage in an argument on the merits of the practice of content warnings. Why turn it into a meta conversation about the fate of the platform? You don’t have strong arguments against content warnings so you want to expand the playing field to include “civility” and “the usage of the Fediverse”?

                                People should advocate for what they believe in, if it makes you feel bad then you should change your behavior not demand they stop pointing it out.

                                scottjenson@social.coopS 1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • kevinhippert@c.imK kevinhippert@c.im

                                  @scottjenson Arn’t you language and tone policing to try to make your online environment more to your liking? You want to set a community standard of being more chill about content warnings while your opponents want them taken more seriously.

                                  Why not engage in an argument on the merits of the practice of content warnings. Why turn it into a meta conversation about the fate of the platform? You don’t have strong arguments against content warnings so you want to expand the playing field to include “civility” and “the usage of the Fediverse”?

                                  People should advocate for what they believe in, if it makes you feel bad then you should change your behavior not demand they stop pointing it out.

                                  scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                                  scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                                  scottjenson@social.coop
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #16

                                  @kevinhippert Not at all! I'm just asking people to be civil and not harass others. If they don't use CW, it's not your job to "train them". It's the number one reason we've been told that people leave Mastodon, that so many people harass them about "they are. doing Mastodon wrong". I hope we can agree that we don't want to chase people away?

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • scottjenson@social.coopS scottjenson@social.coop

                                    We need to talk more about reducing "tone policing" here. I understand you want people to use content warnings, but guess what? They don't have to! If they don't do it, just unfollow them.

                                    But please, don't harass them. That's what drove away our last big wave.

                                    Do whatever you need to feel safe, but harassing people to your standards doesn't make THEM feel safe. Stop it.

                                    scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                                    scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                                    scottjenson@social.coop
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #17

                                    I've already had a few randos in my mentions trying to tell me either:

                                    1) It's ok to correct people if done politely
                                    Just because you use polite words doesn't mean it's polite. If you're giving people advice they didn't ask for, you're harassing them.

                                    2) My request was a form of tone policing
                                    Asking people to not harass others is not "tone policing", it's basic trust and safety. It's that classic sad defence that "you're intolerant too!" if you call out intolerance.

                                    Ummmm, no

                                    scottjenson@social.coopS lkundrak@metalhead.clubL 2 Replies Last reply
                                    0
                                    • scottjenson@social.coopS scottjenson@social.coop

                                      I've already had a few randos in my mentions trying to tell me either:

                                      1) It's ok to correct people if done politely
                                      Just because you use polite words doesn't mean it's polite. If you're giving people advice they didn't ask for, you're harassing them.

                                      2) My request was a form of tone policing
                                      Asking people to not harass others is not "tone policing", it's basic trust and safety. It's that classic sad defence that "you're intolerant too!" if you call out intolerance.

                                      Ummmm, no

                                      scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                                      scottjenson@social.coopS This user is from outside of this forum
                                      scottjenson@social.coop
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #18

                                      Normally I wouldn't engage but I feel strongly we need to have this discussion and call out this almost entirely white male issue.

                                      The entire Mastodon team is working really hard to add features to bring in more people, in a safe way. It doesn't do any good if these guys just chase them away!

                                      stefan@stefanbohacek.onlineS ricci@discuss.systemsR 2 Replies Last reply
                                      0
                                      • scottjenson@social.coopS scottjenson@social.coop

                                        Normally I wouldn't engage but I feel strongly we need to have this discussion and call out this almost entirely white male issue.

                                        The entire Mastodon team is working really hard to add features to bring in more people, in a safe way. It doesn't do any good if these guys just chase them away!

                                        stefan@stefanbohacek.onlineS This user is from outside of this forum
                                        stefan@stefanbohacek.onlineS This user is from outside of this forum
                                        stefan@stefanbohacek.online
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #19

                                        @scottjenson Have you considered this idea?

                                        https://stefanbohacek.online/@stefan/113362664595476664

                                        scottjenson@social.coopS 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • scottjenson@social.coopS scottjenson@social.coop

                                          We need to talk more about reducing "tone policing" here. I understand you want people to use content warnings, but guess what? They don't have to! If they don't do it, just unfollow them.

                                          But please, don't harass them. That's what drove away our last big wave.

                                          Do whatever you need to feel safe, but harassing people to your standards doesn't make THEM feel safe. Stop it.

                                          thisismissem@activitypub.spaceT This user is from outside of this forum
                                          thisismissem@activitypub.spaceT This user is from outside of this forum
                                          thisismissem@activitypub.space
                                          wrote last edited by thisismissem@activitypub.space
                                          #20

                                          If you read the writing of the people who came up with content warnings as implemented in Mastodon, then you'll know that they somewhat regret implementing them.

                                          Meanwhile, I think Bluesky's labeling approach, for all its faults, largely got things right, which is why AP T&S decided to do a content labeling idea (not that I've had time to write the FEPs for it).

                                          Most use-cases for content warnings today are like one-word keywords for people's filtering to hide. The content warnings approach puts the onus on the publisher to consider every possible way that someone may not want to see something that they post, when really it needs to be a balance of power: some self-labelling of content, some automated, and some opt-in, then people can choose what they do and do not want to see, without suppressing the publisher's voice to people who do want to see their content.

                                          Edit: see the swicg/activitypub-trust-and-safety repo's issues on github for the background and links

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